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<title>CJ Satnarine</title>
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<a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/">Home</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/"><strike>Rants</strike> Posts</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/projects/">My Stuff</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/stuff_I_like/">Stuff I Like</a>
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The Anxieties
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<h3 id="subtitle" class="subtitle"><strong>[CJ Satnarine] | 2025-04-26 </strong></h3>
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<p>I have created this website as my portfolio. However, there is a reason why I haven't showed anything in my portfolio. I am scared of some company taking my works and using it to train their generative AIs. It isn't fair. But it's a strange fear. Sometimes I don't care about them and I just create things for the sake of creating them, for the love of the craft. With that mind set, I'll just keep creating the things I'm passionate about, and keep posting them on this website.</p>
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<p>I stopped using Instagram because, to me, it's hell. I don't want to use Instagram, or Pinterest, or even YouTube any more because they don't care about us creators. So, if I were to leave these platforms, what choices do I have? I have this website for my portfolio, of course. But I wouldn't be seen by other people. I don't know if I want to be seen or not, but a portfolio is, well, a display of my work. I didn't start creating just to show other people my work, I created for the sake of creating. Other than this website, there's Artstation. I never posted there before, but maybe when I get better I'll post there. I am <strong>NOT</strong> going to post my work on LinkedIn. I absolutely hate that platform. Everyone seems there seems so fake. Perhaps I hate the professional, corporate culture there.</p>
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<p>Maybe I don't want to share my work on the major platforms. That's a selfish thought, isn't it? Yes, no one is going to see my work. It will be kept all to myself. But that isn't me. I want to share to inspire others to create, as others have inspired me to create. I want to help others learn, and I want to see the amazing things they create. My happiness comes from others discovering and expressing their passions. I'm constantly struggling with myself, fighting between the urge to isolate myself from everything (online and in person) and the urge to spend more time with people. I can't seem to find a balance.</p>
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<p>I don't know why I'm sharing this here. I don't know a lot of things. But what I do know is that this is <em>my</em> website. I've been told that it wasn't professional enough. I don't care. I can share whatever I wish on this website. So I'll share this bit of me with you. After writing all of that, I have decided to post my works here. The companies will keep stealing work, there's not doubt about that, but I'll keep creating and sharing. Thank you for reading this little rant of mine. Sorry for wasting your time, it could have been spent doing something productive.</p>
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<p>Tschau.</p>
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<a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/">Home</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/"><strike>Rants</strike> Posts</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/projects/">My Stuff</a>
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First blog post: Website Stuff
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<h3 id="subtitle" class="subtitle"><strong>[CJ Satnarine] | 2025-03-21 </strong></h3>
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<p>This is the first blog post I have made here, or any where for that matter. The entire purpose of this blog was to test out how it would be to write one.</p>
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<h2 id="in-the-beginning">In the beginning...</h2>
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<p>This website project started as a plain, unstyled HTML file that had a couple of changes occasionally.
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<img src="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/first-blog/html_image.png" alt="html_image" /></p>
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<h2 id="the-head">The Head</h2>
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<p>The idea for the head came from a project I was working on (a <a href="https://github.com/CJSatnarine/tiny_renderer">tiny renderer</a>), where a wireframe render inspired me to add a rotating wireframe furry wolf head to my personal website.</p>
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<center><img src="output.gif" width="640" height="360"/></center>
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<p>To accomplish this, I created a wolf head in Blender and exported it in a Wavefront .obj format. I used <a href="https://threejs.org/">Three.js</a> to render the wolf head on the website. This version of the website is where I also started using CSS.</p>
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<p>I should note that this was the first time I was working with JavaScript and CSS, and if it wasn't for some amazing people guiding me and answering my questions, I would have probably not made it this far. To deploy this website, I used Vite.</p>
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<h2 id="zola">Zola</h2>
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<p>I love using markdown. I prefer it over most other markup languages, and I write most of my notes in it. When I found out I could use markdown for web dev, I started to replace my previous website design to use Zola (mostly so I can get help from a friend that uses/recommended it). This took me about a week to do, somehow.</p>
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<h2 id="what-next">What next?</h2>
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<p>I plan on uploading more work onto here: projects, devlogs, art or animations, and more blogs.</p>
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<a href="https://evilr.ing/cjsatnarine/previous"><</a>
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<a href="https://evilr.ing">EVILRING</a>
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<a href="https://evilr.ing/cjsatnarine/next">></a>
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<p> Made with <a href="https://www.getzola.org/">Zola</a></p>
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<a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/">Home</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/"><strike>Rants</strike> Posts</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/projects/">My Stuff</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/stuff_I_like/">Stuff I Like</a>
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Blog Posts (Rants)
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<ul>
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<li><a id="blog_colour" href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/plans/">Plans</a></li>
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<li><a id="blog_colour" href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/anxieties/">The Anxieties</a></li>
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<li><a id="blog_colour" href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/first-blog/">First blog post: Website Stuff</a></li>
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<nav>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/blog/"><strike>Rants</strike> Posts</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/projects/">My Stuff</a>
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<span id="text"> | </span><a href="https://cjsatnarine.github.io/stuff_I_like/">Stuff I Like</a>
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<h1 id="title" class="title">
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Plans
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<h3 id="subtitle" class="subtitle"><strong>[CJ Satnarine] | 2025-05-03 </strong></h3>
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<p>As an excuse for a post, I decided to share my plans for the next few months (or possibly longer). This is also a way to pressure myself to commit to these things that I want to do, as this post serves as a reminder to myself.</p>
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<h2 id="volunteering">Volunteering</h2>
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<p>I started volunteering at a computer recycling centre, and I absolutely love helping out there. I plan to keep going for as long as I can.</p>
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<h2 id="studies">Studies</h2>
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<p>There are a lot of things I want to study. I'm unemployed and currently not going to school, so I have abundant free time. I'm not going to school is because I learn slower compared to most people. School moves too quickly for me. What should take a few hours to learn for other people usually takes me a few days. Oh, and post-secondary education is expensive. The resources I need to learn stuff is available freely on the internet, so I'm going to make use of that.</p>
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<h3 id="stem"><em>STEM</em></h3>
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<p>It has been way too long since I've studied any sort of maths, so I really need to get back at it. My focus would be linear algebra and geometry, as they are essential for understanding graphics programming. I want to learn more about circuitry and computer engineering (which I'm learning a lot while volunteering for a computer recycling centre). I need to relearn a lot of Computer Science stuff as well (such as data structures and algorithms).</p>
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<h3 id="linguistics"><em>Linguistics</em></h3>
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<p>My main focus for now isn't to study languages, as much as I would want to. I'm going to spend less time with linguistics and more time with the maths and tech projects.</p>
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<h3 id="animation"><em>Animation</em></h3>
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<p>I'm planning to study a lot of films (not only animated films) to better understand film making and animation. I plan on diving deeper, far deeper from where I left off in my Blender learning journey a few years ago. I'll start learning scary things like Sculpting and Compositing.</p>
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<h2 id="projects">Projects</h2>
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<p>The projects are mostly for reinforcing the studying, but there are some things I want to try out and experiment.</p>
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<h3 id="graphics-programming"><em>Graphics Programming</em></h3>
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<p>I will be working on a few projects to better further my understanding on graphics as a whole. My goal by the end of this is to create a graphics engine for rasterizing and raytracing. I also want to experiment a lot with shaders. They used to scare me when I was younger but now I'm probably older and less scared of shader programming. I think for these projects I'll work in OpenGL.</p>
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<h3 id="animation-1"><em>Animation</em></h3>
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<p>I'm going to be using the knowledge from my animation studies (and assistance from the ✨animation sibling✨) to make my own animations. I will be working mainly in Blender.</p>
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<h3 id="game-development"><em>Game Development</em></h3>
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<p>I have a few game development projects in mind (in particular, Slugbury 2), but I'm going to focus more on the graphics programming projects. I'm going to spend most of my game development in Godot.</p>
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<h3 id="music"><em>Music</em></h3>
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<p>I want to learn music but it seems very scary. The only musical instrument I played was a recorder in 2018 and I sucked at it. I'm going to try to dabble a bit in LMMS and Audacity. There's also an electric guitar of the ✨music sibling✨ I can borrow and learn that but that's going to take too much effort and time.</p>
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<h2 id="thoughts">Thoughts</h2>
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<p>Okay, so I have a lot planned (as vaguely as they're written here LOL). How am I going to do so much in so little time? I don't know, honestly. A lot of my future projects and studying require a lot of time. I'm having a hard time finding a balance between all the things I want to do, and with the way things is going I seem to be doing things based on how I feel at the time. I'm going to try to set myself a schedule, with a focus on learning maths and a mix of graphics programming and animation.</p>
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<p>I expect a lot from these plans and I hope follow through with them. There's a high chance I end up not doing a lot of the things here, and that's fine (as long as I study and understand the maths and make a few animations). I'm not sure how to end this but I hope you enjoy whatever I make in the future.</p>
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<p>Tschau.</p>
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